Oh Captain!! My Captain!!
Reading Sartre is intimidating, depriving a curious onlooker like me of any hopes of resilience! But in “tête-à-tête”, when the intimate moments shared by Beauvoir and Sartre are on display, I am bemused, left groping for a pulse of my usual instinctive judgment. Is it the case of Fallen Idols? Or Elevated Mortals?
When Beauvoir Says, “In what a ‘desert world’ I walk, so arid, with the only oases my intermittent esteem for myself”, I witness a resonance in me, a carnival of alternating hope and despair.
I choose elitism to not let ‘laissez faire’ be the motto for a risk-free life muddled with the mundane, more so, to so consciously override the effects of my overbearing past conditioning and subsequent deprivation. There IS a protective conformity in elitism. Time and again, I step out of this shell, only to return bruised with vengeance not to swerve again! There begin contemplations…..
The windows of retrospection can produce some crystal clear deliverance. It takes the accumulated experiences of some suffering and loss to reflect upon something in the past with clarity, leading to a present day’s pristine perspective. Look at this: … PLA wrote this to me ages ago:
“Thoughts are strange things at times - profoundly impacting in a moment to avariciously ridiculous. And then one day it's the amazing realization that there is a person who in his own gentility and nobleness wants to be associated with you and share thoughts that rarely leave the realm of intimacy.
Perceptively, life can be so chaotic, thoughts being an integral part of our eternally woven existence. Yet it is the soothing acceptance of a wonderful person in perfect resonance with you that somehow brings in a whole new colour. And you just want to soak its blissfulness in all its glory - mentally, emotionally and physically.”
The epiphany leads to a depth of gratitude. My admiration, trust and tenderness towards you PLA are sans reservation. And now a solitary tear wells up……
When Beauvoir Says, “In what a ‘desert world’ I walk, so arid, with the only oases my intermittent esteem for myself”, I witness a resonance in me, a carnival of alternating hope and despair.
I choose elitism to not let ‘laissez faire’ be the motto for a risk-free life muddled with the mundane, more so, to so consciously override the effects of my overbearing past conditioning and subsequent deprivation. There IS a protective conformity in elitism. Time and again, I step out of this shell, only to return bruised with vengeance not to swerve again! There begin contemplations…..
The windows of retrospection can produce some crystal clear deliverance. It takes the accumulated experiences of some suffering and loss to reflect upon something in the past with clarity, leading to a present day’s pristine perspective. Look at this: … PLA wrote this to me ages ago:
“Thoughts are strange things at times - profoundly impacting in a moment to avariciously ridiculous. And then one day it's the amazing realization that there is a person who in his own gentility and nobleness wants to be associated with you and share thoughts that rarely leave the realm of intimacy.
Perceptively, life can be so chaotic, thoughts being an integral part of our eternally woven existence. Yet it is the soothing acceptance of a wonderful person in perfect resonance with you that somehow brings in a whole new colour. And you just want to soak its blissfulness in all its glory - mentally, emotionally and physically.”
The epiphany leads to a depth of gratitude. My admiration, trust and tenderness towards you PLA are sans reservation. And now a solitary tear wells up……
posted by VVV @ 8:37 PM
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